Monday, October 20, 2008

A Sad Goodbye

On thursday night I went out for an exquisite dinner at my friend and chefs Crispins place. I never normally answer or even take my phone out but on this evening I chose to not only take it but also to pick up ..I found it odd that someone should call me after nine pm so I answered it to hear the devastating news that someone I had been very close to had taken their own life only an hour before. I felt so saddened by the news which is still haunting me and was only reflecting a few days prior how much this person had contributed to my settling here in Los Angeles.
I had been given her phone number by a mutual friend in London in 2006 and during my first few bleak weeks of living in a new country I had called her and although our conversation was somewhat bizarre it was comforting to hear a British voice . We met by accident about a month later and became instant friends. She asked me to help her with a specific problem of hers of which I had a bit of experience and it was the beginning of a pretty intense friendship..she was intelligent ,open and lovable and was often gloriously irreverent ...she was a real individual and truely English in her eccentricity...she was also never far away from intense mental and spiritual pain.
For about 7 months we would speak up to 4 times daily and the distraction of her troubles would take me away from the loneliness and despair I felt about leaving England..She was a blessing to me..After about a year we started drifting in different directions and following seperate pathes and I knew I could no longer help her.In the last year I saw hardly anything of her...but the question still comes into my head ..I wonder if there is anything I could have done to prevent such an out come?The answer is no..sometimes the pain people suffer is just too much..I hope she is now at peace.

Saturday, October 11, 2008

crunching on credit

Well its all hotting up re the elections..and turning into a right old mud slinging contest ,but mainly the dirt is being slung at Obama who seems to have no dark secrets but the McCain Palin camp try tirelessly to associate Obama with terrorists and no -gooders..the links are so tiny and tenuous its laughable..if not that then they are terrorising the Americans by saying ooooh its all so scary Americas falling apart you cant possible risk a vote on that new upstart..better vote for us again..we're safe and the devil you know. etc etc..and yet the definition of the word "insanity" is repeating the same mistake over and over again and not learning from past mistakes.Does America want to repeat the old mistake ?. A well informed friend told me that since the Bush administration the Rich are 8 times richer while the poor and middle class are much worse off and God forbid theres a medical emergency because if you dont have the proper Insurance you will possibly end up selling your house or going bankrupt.. Britain gets some things right ..God Bless the English National health System ..we salute you despite long waits etc ..I have delivered 3 babies in the capable hands of the NHS without incident or complications and I now hear that Gordon Brown is advising the Bush administration on how to deal with the credit crunch..good old Blighty.